Incognito

A Tommie here, a Tommie there (1)

2006-08-26T12:20:00.000-07:00

Little J walked out of the toilet, and he had peed on his feet, yet again. I stared at him, the glare packing enough punch to make him urinate all over again...but he didnt. What he did was unthinkable. He walked upto Ricko, the family pet, a huge labrador that the neighbourhood often mistook for a pig. He then slowly slid his feet under R's belly, and cleaned the stinking fluid on poor Ricko's tummy.

"Damn it.. you Idiot" I screamed "What do you think you are doing?"
"aan...." he mumbled, bewildered
"You are not supposed to do that to R, I mean he is not a fucking bathroom mat..." I sort of tried to explain
"Tommie likes it...", he uttered with a snigger.

"T-O-M-M-I-E !" I yelled, "that dog is called Ricko"

I was finding it to difficult to believe that the little piece of shit in front of me thought "Ricko" was some bull-shit "Tommie", he wasnt, he was "Ricko" and thats it.....

"Ricko..you get" I asked, trying to plumb into his mucky, disgusting and barely functioning brains to find out if he had got it.

"He...he.....he" he giggled, still standing near Ricko. Only if Ricko could understand what the moron had just done to it, he probably would enjoy a piece of underage human ass for lunch. But uh!! hes a dog after all......

~~~To be continued~~~

Humiliated. Repressed. What else?

2006-08-05T12:53:00.000-07:00

All of these things happening in a short duration of about 5 hours, a miracle indeed.

The Forum for Equality (F4E) wanted to organise a human chain in the city of Kanpur, a peaceful demonstration that was to involve students from IIT Kanpur, other city colleges, as well as citizens of Kanpur. But well, in the world's largest democracy, peaceful protest is forbidden, bad they didn't know that. As hundreds of IIT students got ready for the protest with banners and placards ready, what did they find - Police waiting for them at the gate. The cops wouldnt let the students leave the campus. And thats not the end of it, they wouldnt let any IIT student leave the campus!!, lest they join some protest. So they ended up blocking the very gate, creating a traffic problem. But little did the police game plan dampen the students soaring spirits. They started protesting right at the gate itself.

In the above pic (apologies for the poor quality, but there's only so much I can do with a cell phone) one can see students forming a chain at the IIT gate itself. All of them wanted to go to a certain location in Kanpur, but only if the cops let them.

The ruckus continued for about 3 more hours. The students continued shouting slogans with all their energies, while the police (and must I add, certain onlookers as well) continued to mock them. "Stay in your campus..." was all the men in Khaki seemed to be saying.

Finally, they brought this big van, and shoved in 12 of the students and drove away (that is precisely what the above picture tried to capture, the poor quality is regretted), while the rest of the students continued gazing at them, sad and forlorn, the subtleties of the government's treachery now staring out like the bones of a starving beast, their slogans drowning in the cavernous depths of a smug country. Once these students were taken away, the cops left. Everything was back to normal, as if nothing ever had happened. The situation had been defused. An attempt of the students to peacefully protest a government move that they didnt approve of had been successfully foiled. And a democracy it is!!!

New sem!!!!

2006-08-02T07:15:00.000-07:00

There...they finally gave me a single room...not a good one though ..hehe

Things have now changed, from the standard bread and butter that I ate almost everyday for breakfast, I have now shifted to corn flakes. This does not mark a change in my tastes, its actually the only thing I can lay my hands on when I arrive at the mess at around 7:45 am. The mess at this time resembles a fish market. Hordes of hungry students, each ready to eat the other! So in the pandemonium, if one is able to lay his hands on a bowl of cereal, one has to be lucky. It sure marks the start of a great day ;)

Sometime last month, after I had put up my previous post, some filthy nitwit walked into the sunset with my cell phone is his pockets. I had a fair idea of who it was, but theres little one can do in such situations. BTW, a lot of people lost their cell phones at around the same time. Wonder if it had to do something with the weather those days! I got a new one subsequently, I had been told I would be getting my new cell a long time ago, loss of my previous cell phone only made it imperative that I get the new phone...

In the meanwhile, while I was relaxing at home, the Department of Telecommunication (DoT) did a rather funny thing. They got all Indian internet service providers (ISPs) to block www.blogger.com !!! As I lay on my couch and listened to the rotten jingbang the media created of the, should I say goof-up, I wondered what kind of a decision that was. They had, aha, blocked bloggingincognito as well. Goodness gracious!! And they had blocked thousands of other personal blogs as well. Not that all of us wrote the same kinds of things on our blogs, like I know people who write about how their spouses clean the toilets, while they have fun jerking off on the dining table, and others believe visitors (if any) to their blogs would be interested to know what they did to enlarge their suppositional breasts the previous night. There could be little point in blocking such prodigious write-ups. I mean, come on, what happened to our right to free speech?

It was on the next day that the truth dawned upon me. The government wanted only a few blogs blocked, which allegedly contained objectionable/seditionary material. I dont exactly know what sites they were, or as to why the very virtuous UPA government suddenly thought of blocking them. Its still a mystery to me. The ISPs, wanting to take things easy, decided to block entire domains. So instead of blocking, say, hoohaahoo.blogspot.com, the ISPs blocked blogger instead. Ingenious, indeed.

A MOST happening week

2006-06-18T06:30:00.000-07:00

Ooo..la..la...the masquer's back...

This week, was truly happening, in more ways than one. I am sure reader, that you are no where near interested in the mast things that happened to me, but well, thoda sunne mein kya jaata hai. In fact, some of these happenings (or mishaps perhaps!) may actually make you a li'l smarter (not that I am assuming you aren't smart, so no offense meant!!)

For the starters, my massive simulation failed. And not because of an error in the code, a power failure or some other external reason, but simply because, the programmer, that is me, had forgotten to set a very important parameter. In case you didnt know, I had been trying to run this massive implementation since the past 4-5 days, on multiple computers, using multiple logins (which, it happens, is not allowed on the campus. It blocks resources, according to the laboratory staff!). But there, it just went on and on and on, till I realised that something had gone wrong.... :-(

As my simulation ran over the entire of the past week, there was little I did in that time. I was mostly on Orkut. Its not that the thing is interesting, but as everyone says, just timepass. Lekin the prob is, timepass kab aadat ban jaye, noone knows. So if you are still not on Orkut, I would advise you to stay away. It doesnt do you a lot of good (though I dont blame the website for my simulation's failure).

In the week that has been, dearest wingy K finally gave his treat. This treat had been well fought for, by a couple of other wingies, so much so that K was ready to show almost anything. It was like he was dying to give his treat. So had Bollywood and Hollywood gone on strike, refusing to release any movies, K wouldnt have hesitated for a moment to take us to Sapna or some such darn theater for the latest C-grade nangi-pungi movie (ahh! not that I wouldnt have gone ;-) that would have been more exciting..). In case you are wondering what movie he took us to, it was Chup chup ke, starring that useless Shahid Kapur, and a (thank God) dumb Kareena Kapur. But Kareena being dumb was no guarantee against the rest of the cast not over-acting! And so there it was, a crap-fest of a movie, with only Rajpal Yadav managing to make the junta smile now and then.

But the highlight of the week has been (once again!) the SURGE program. But well, it was not me (or my sim) this time. The program, for the uninitiated, had a weekend outing concept, which meant that the organisers were to take us out on a treat once every week, so we could interact amongst ourselves, and build camradiere (<--is the spelling right?). Last Friday we got a mail saying we (all the SURGE students) were to be taken out to watch Phir hera pheri. Good, I thought. Free movie, so I could buy pop-corn (in case you are wondering, well, the owner of this blog is not rich, so free movie tics => cash to buy popcorn, these multiplex owners are real dakoos, ever noticed how things like popcorn and samose are so exorbitantly priced at such places??). Okie, so coming back to my kahaani, on Saturday, we got a second mail. It was titled "Some important points to note". I guessed it might have things like
(1) stay in a group, or you might get lost!!!!
(2) Please carry your own water bottles ....water's expensive ;-)

But no, I was wrong. The contents of the mail, or the important points were as follows :-
(1) We leave in a bus from the VH at 1630 hours on Monday, please assemble in time.

And....hold your breath..here comes the stunner.....
(2) Please carry Rs 80/- with you for the movie tickets. Carry change for your own convenience.

Yippeee!!! So they were paying for the bloody bus...wasnt that fabulous. And popcorn...well, maybe next time masquey boy...

And yes, I did go, this was the first time I think I watched a movie on a 80 Rs ticket, a totally shitty I scream-you scream-everyone screams kind of movie, that can only give one a splitting headache. And that, it did give me.

Ohh yes, the SURGE organisers would like to have a link to some of our blogs, of people participating in the program, so future students in the program could log into our "thoughts" and read about our "experiences" during the program. You think I should forward a link to my blog too?? hehe :-)

Racists...!!!

2006-06-10T11:42:00.000-07:00

I have been wanting to make a post on this since long, but its only today that I have found the time and the motivation.

It began when I watched the movie 'Crash', the ugly face of racism in the big and bright city of Los Angeles was revealed, the whites vs the blacks, native Americans vs naturalised Americans, and so on. It was then that it hit me....

I couldnt but think of Indians in America. There are so many of them there, most of them highly qualified doctors, engineers (alumni of the IITs!!). Do they or dont they face it? Are they OK with the racist slurs that they might be subjected to, if not frequently, atleast occasionally?

I dont know the answer. But let me imagine a scenario wherein someone from Africa, decides to settle in India. This person, let us say, is a highly qualified scientist, holding degrees from a top university in his homeland. And he's smart, very smart indeed. In deciding to live on in India, this person, has in more ways than one 'escaped' his country. He understands very well that India offers to himself and his family opportunities that his country could never have given him. In a few years time, he will learn to do everything 'my' way, the Indian way. Maybe he will learn to speak Hinglish, say namaste in flawless Hindi, and maybe even start enjoying watching cricket, or enjoying Siddhu's commentary! But to me, he will always be the African, the one who left behind his pathetic god-forsaken homeland, so he could enjoy 'my' country. No matter what he does, I will never be able to accept him as an Indian.....because he will never be an Indian to me. He will always be the African, the wretched African.

Does that make me racist? Yes, it does. But isnt this a universal phenomenon, isnt closet racism as widespread and rampant as any other negative human emotion? The fact is, it is. And we cant blame the Americans or Europeans when they appear racist. They are as human as we are. So if Indians out there are victims of such vieled but demeaning racism, there is little they can do about it. They might learn to imitate the American accent, may start listening to Eminem to show they are cool, may substitute coffee for the daily chai, may even start wiping their asses with toilet paper, but all said and done, they will always be the Indians who ran away from their own countries, who escaped the misery, poverty and ugly mysticism that India symbolises to the West. And thats not the end of it, like so many westerners, these naturalised Americans/Europeans will someday start displaying utmost contempt for all things Indian, metamorphose into what are known as India haters, just to show everyone just how American or European they are....

But no matter what they do, and how much they do, they need to understand that they will always be those Indians. Even if they went on to become the richest men on those foreign shores, they will still be treated with contempt, after all, they were from India...weren't they?

Ice-Cream

2006-05-29T12:29:00.000-07:00

'So you play any games', she asked
I rolled my eyes. 'No', I said
'Did you ever play any games', she continued
What she was trying to get at? I looked into the mirror in front of me. I could see myself, and her, and a lot of others, enjoying their ice-creams. 'Nice ice cream parlour, isnt it?' I asked her.
'You didn't answer my question!' She said, giving me a rather cheeky grin.
I tried to smile, I couldn't. I tried harder, but you cant force one, can you?

For one, I didnt find it funny, or as the messenger audible goes, '... Not even in the same zip code as funny'. And well, I really couldnt remember the time I actually played games. It was like, the past in black-n-white. And no, this wasn't embarassing, but plain irritating. She had been shooting off questions, one after the other, questions to which I had no answers. Somethine else demanded my fuller attentions, the chocoloate chip icecream I held.

My ice-cream was melting. So I gave it a big lick, the kind that fills your entire mouth, making you temporarily unable to speak. I desperately hoped she would try something like that too, to give me a little break. She didnt. Maybe her ice-cream wasnt that good, bad choice, huh?

'Where are you from?'
There, she started again.
'IIT' I said, saying those three letters made me feel, well, should I say dignified?
'No..I meant, like the place you belong to'
'Me...' I queried, knowing very well she was talking to me. She was asking me yes, but silly me, I thought I could pull that one off.
'I am not squint eyed, am I?' she gnarled at me. I didnt like that look of hers, it seemed to be melting my ice-cream faster than it otherwise would.
'uhh, I didnt mean that' I blurted out, and at the same time could see a big blob of my ice-cream race towards the floor. Gravity in action, f**k ! I hated wasting such good ice-cream...I almost had an urge to wipe it off the floor, and then gobble it up. But you cant do that, can you? Not with this weirdo girl watching over me.

She was silent now. Maybe she didnt like me any more. I never liked her anyway, so no probs. I went back to my ice-cream, it still was delicious. But the little melting mass on the floor, will haunt me for some time now. How could I drop it like that? How could I really??

Empty Spaces

2006-05-26T11:29:00.000-07:00

Thats what the library looks these days.....deserted. I dont know why I took these pictures, probably because I thought they were amusing. I mean, this is the very corridor, where about a couple of weeks ago, people couldnt find a decent place to sit.....and they sat in between the corridors, on the floors....everywhere....anywhere.

And this is how it looks today........empty. This, I must say is a rare photograph, almost impossible to get this pic once the college restarts. Once its back to powerpacked mugaai.

This is another empty corridor you can see, ofcourse there is also someone sitting here. Busy he looks.....

Hope to catch some more nice pics soon....hehe

Picky Pics

2006-05-15T12:08:00.000-07:00

My roommate has what I call the Orkut fetish. You know you have it when

-> You are desperately trying to increase your profile views. To do so, you visit all sorts of arbitrary people online, and scrap them. These people, bewildered upon reading your shitty message come back to find out who you are....and bingo, you have an additional profile visit.

-> You launch new communities, with unknown (read Crappy) intentions, and send out invites to everyone on your friend's list to join the community. You hope for someone to fall for it, sadly no sane person usually does, except ofcourse your other Orkut friends with a similiar fixation.

-> You feel this desperate, uncontrollable urge to change your profile pic every single day (in extreme cases, can be even twice/thrice a day). When you finally run out of snapshots, you start uploading images of inanimate objects. Typical examples are, for men, guns, knives, the_middle_finger, and for women, flowers, birds, chinky (mongoloid) cartoons, etc etc. One fine day when you even exhaust these, I foresee you putting up hi-resolution pics of real horse shit, because thats what you really are.

-> You find yourself scrapping yourself, more often than others scrap you. You dont really know why you are doing it, but nevertheless, cant seem to stop.

-> You go out in search of Orkut memorabilia. Because there is none available at present, you decide to create something for yourself. So you start sporting Orkut T-shirts, bags, coffee mugs, and perhaps to show how much you care for the darned website, you wear an "I love Orkut" underwear too....

I cant seem to remember other symptoms, though I believe there do exist some more. Will sure put them up here, as I remember them....

Who's REALLY responsible?

2006-05-05T04:15:00.000-07:00

The suicide by fourth year Chemical Engineering student Shailesh Sharma on Wednesday has opened up a new can of worms at IIT Kanpur. The question that we now need to answer is, was it just the taxing courses or demanding professors who were responsible? Or was there something else too.

The course was hard, yes, and the professor wasn't too lenient either. But what really pissed the guy off was probably, peer pressure. Its the stigma of failing a course again and again that finally drove the poor guy to an early grave. In my previous post I had mentioned mentoring for such students, to stop them from taking such extreme steps. But sadly enough, through a rather long discussion with some of my wingmates, I have now realised that it wouldnt work. Why, you ask. Well here it is.

As a student preparing for the JEE around three years ago, I dreamt of joining at IIT, and being amongst the best, or well, *competing* amongst the best. I achieved my goal, but was it really what I wanted. Two years into IIT, and I really dont know if it really was. Hysterical competition is what the IIT is all about. Everyone is trying to outdo the other. And for the unfortunate ones who have to face the misfortune of failing at this, God help them. There is just *NO* excuse. They are condemned to suffer, to face derision, and in the worst cases to end their lives.

In my third semester, a second year Mech guy Swapnil committed suicide. He jumped off the sixth floor of the Fac Building. We had a chemistry exam that day, at 8 AM (he too had it, the entire second year was doing that course). His body was discovered at around 7 AM, he hadnt even written the exam, forget waiting for the results. He didnt leave a note, and so we will never really know why he did it. But what could it have been? He was a good student, had something close to 8/10.

Sometime after his death, I started to hear more about him. He was, what we at IIT call, a 'Muggu'. He put in long hours at the library, studying, solving assignments. "So whats wrong with that" you are probably asking. Wrong! , hell its blasphemous at IIT, more so when a hardcore 'Muggu' isnt able to score marks commensurate with the efforts he/she is putting in. It is so very cool to be chilling out all through the semester, and then get a 9 pointer at the end of the sem, and so pitiful to be working god damn hard and scoring something in the 7's or 6's. Could it be that Swapnil was thinking something on these lines while he took that extreme step? Was it like "Itna mugta hoon, lekin phir bhi lagne waali hai is exam mein? " It could be. How would his wingmates have reacted had he written that exam in the morning, and still had scored only average (or worse, below-average) marks?
"Kitna mugta hai, phir bhi chud jaata hai. Kya hai be, kaise aa gaya ye yahan", is what the conversation might have been like in his wing.

And no, if you think this kind of bitching goes on behind the backs of the students concerned, you are mistaken. Its said almost on their faces. Someone said something very similiar to me in my first semester itself, on the night before a Math exam. I was stunned beyond belief. Here I was, at 2 in the night, slogging it out on that last assignment, trying my best, and this is what I get to hear. I remember it all too well. The person who said it was, yes, someone who was really *cool*. He bunked classes and still got the 10 on 10 in all the quizzes, while I with all I had could only manage a meagre 7! After the guy who said this left my room, I closed my books and went off to sleep, I just couldnt concentrate after I had heard that. It hurt so badly, it pains me even today, one and a half years later.

Because I did manage to score a rather decent CPI in that and the following semesters, I wasnt subjected to such contemptuous comments frequently, though I admit to still having to face them occassionally. But what if I had failed that Math test? Or maybe some other exam. I really can't imagine. Probably I too would have gone Swapnil's way, what with courses I cant pass and my own classmates laughing behind my back, and worse, speculating if I cheated in the JEE to come to this place.

Nothing else matters here. It just that x.y on your grade sheet that counts. Before you take an elective, the prof might only want to know if you had an A in the pre-req. You might be called to the front of the class and asked to solve a problem, and in case you failed to do it, you might have to face the ignominy of letting the entire class know what your CPI is and then be reminded by the prof that you are *worthless*, and ahh!, isn't your entire class giggling at all of this?

I may have gone overboard here, but I hope I have been able to make my point. Its not just the courses or the professors who are responsible, but rather the entire student community is to blame.

A Second One at IIT K

2006-05-03T07:22:00.000-07:00

In the evening, as alongwith a couple of friends we were looking at the 'F' list on the DOSA notice board, we couldn't help noticing that there was this course in Chemical Engineering that had around 12 fakkas (F grades). A little too high for a departmental course. And then someone remarked "Is baar kisi ne suicide nahi kiya na!" The entire group standing there burst out laughing. I bet, each one of us knew that the joke was sick. But then it was quite a fact that the suicide by a second year Mechanical Engineering student during the end-sem examinations had resulted in somewhat reasonable grading the previous semester. And this time, no one had done it. Courses like Flu-Mech thus had even final yearites being given F grades (oh yes, the students *were* responsible, there's no running away from that, but we will come back to this in a short while).

An hour ago, I got the news. A Final year chemical engineering student had slid his wrist, and had been discovered dead in his hostel room. He was one of those who had been awarded an F in the very course that was the thrust behind that demented joke that I had heard (and laughed at) about a couple of hours ago. History had repeated itself.

Now coming to the point that the student himself was responsible for the fakka in Flu-Mech and that suicide was taking things a little too far. The course in question is a fluid mechanics course that sophomores in chemical engineering do in the fourth semester of their 4 (5) year programs. The very fact that the person involved was a final yearite makes it clear that he must have failed the course earlier (i.e. in his second year). His failure to get a passing grade in his second attempt raises two important questions : 1) Did he have any interest in the course?
2) Did he have the necessary ability?

Given that I didnt know the victim personally, I can answer neither of those questions. If the answer to the first was in the affirmative, then, theres little any one can do about the situation. IIT is one place where hundreds of students drag themselves through uninteresting programs year after year. And sadly, this applies more so to the undergraduates. 18 or 19 year olds have little idea of what majors they are choosing (I have already written realms on this, the interested reader might look into the archives, or better still, google around). By the time they(the students) realise what they have got into, its already too late. The hapless students are left to themselves, to be crushed under the weights of insane courses they were never meant to do. Its a shame that India's best technological institute cant help such students, its own students. Many students dont have any interest in the course. This, *cannot* be remedied without the students own participation.

The other thing is that the Institute probably doesnt even believe in having a suitable psychological structure for such weaker students to lean on. They are left alone, coping with the profs, repeating courses and being damned in general. Low self-esteem, coupled with failing courses that most of their friends seem to be passing, takes these students 'out of the loop'. Suicide, or other destructive tendencies are then purely a matter of time rather than anything else.

The only solution I can think of is having a Mentor-Student structure for these students. They need to be under the observation of their teachers. Instead of just working on their powerpoint slides to create that hopeless drone in their lectures, and setting questions for the exams, the professors should try to get to the emotional side of their students. Atleast of students who are failing courses and might need someone to talk to them, or more importantly, to listen to them.

*Edit*
http://www.tribuneindia.com/2006/20060107/saturday/main1.htm

This article in The Tribune has some additional interesting facts and related commentary regarding suicides at IIT Kanpur as well as at other IITs in the recent past. It talks of the initiatives that the IITs had wanted to take to curb the suicide rate, which quite obviously have not been taken (or else have been attempted very half-heartedly). It also isnt a coincidence that the article comes up with the same solution ("proper counselling") for the problem, as I have come up in my blog. Is someone listening?

Mandal 2, Are you ready for it ?

2006-04-08T13:17:00.000-07:00

They have done it again, and this time they have been so guarded and reticent that they have successfully pulled it off, without ruffling as much as a feather.

They amended the constitution first, so as to prevent any untoward incidents later. For governments that are known for their miserable management of even the most important affairs, this sure was one of those exceptional times, when everything goes just according to plan.

So now, IITs and IIMs are going to have to give around 50% of their seats to candidates whose only claim to fame would be names they were born with. Welcome to India!!! Welcome to the country that is supposedly positioned to be a 'tech-leader'!!!!!

The intentions - well the usual brouhaha about the upliftment of the downtrodden, social equality, and god knows what else. And no, this isn't just one man, or one political party that is pushing this, while the Congress is leading from the front, its being given whole-hearted support by the BJP, the CPI, and probably every other political party in the country. After all, they all stand to gain, dont they? Its not very often that they get to influence the OBC votebank that easily, and that completely.

I do not know if this new set of reservations will be of any benefit to those so-called backward classes. But one thing they will certainly do is wreck the IIT system (and those of all the other Central universities being brought under the purview of the new regulations). When 50% of a class is comprised of people whose presence isn't justified by their merit, but by other things, it doesnt require a rocket scientist's brain to understand the consequences. The IITs, according to some modest estimates, stand to lose around 1300 seats to this new rule. That essentially means, 1300 bright, deserving candidates will be denied the opportunity to be part of this institution just because they were born into a particular caste! It cannot possibly get any worse than this.

The original idea was to have the reservations for 10 years, and then be done with it. The political milieu never could gather the courage to end them, but what is amazing is the kind of missionary zeal they display when it comes to 'increasing' reservations. Shameless you think, no, Criminal is a more appropriate word.

Just to give you an insider's view of things, let me tell you something about IIT itself. The candidates are selected through the well known JEE (which incidentally is being held today!). The current reservation of 22.5% is rather uniformly distributed amongst all the departments at IIT. So you have around 4 seats in CS, maybe a little more in EE, and so on. Because of the reservations, what often happens is, reserved category students getting a tiny fraction of the general candidates cutoff (in the JEE) gain admission into some of the best (and toughest) courses at IIT. The JEE is not the end of the competition. You have courses to clear, projects to complete, exams to excel in at IIT after that. And this is where the students coming in through the quota systems miserably fail (well, atleast most of them). Some IITs, like Kanpur for instance even have specially designed SLOW-PACE programs for such students, so they could still manage, albeit with a slightly slower course, and ofcourse much lesser competition.

This is not the end of the story. Of the 22.5% reservation, some seats still fall vacant because they cant get students even to secure the minimum marks (in the reserved category, which is often much below the general cutoff) in the entrance exams. So shouldn't they allot these seats to the general candidates who had appeared and done well in the test. No. They dont do that. What they instead do is take in some more reserved category students (those who couldn't even secure the minimum cutoff marks in the reserved category), and put them in what they call a 'Preparatory course'. The IITs train these students for the next one year, so they can write the JEE again the next year and get through. This when the poor general candidates who fail the test have to undergo enormous trauma, and may have to spend thousands of rupees in coaching fees to prepare themselves for the next year's JEE.

All in all, this has to be stopped. At all costs.

There is already an online petition doing the rounds. http://www.petitiononline.com/obcrev/petition.html

And you could read Freaky's blog here http://www.the-freaky-chakra.blogspot.com/ . He will tell you how the reservations system is wrecking management education in India.

Kaun Banega President

2006-04-02T06:34:00.000-07:00

A lot has happened since I last blogged, but this post is just about one of them. Probably the most important one of them.

Shanky (the guy in the room adjacent to mine) ran for the post of Gymkhana President. For those not familiar with the Gymkhana system at IITK, the Gymkhana President is the highest post in the Student's body. The President, who is elected by a secret ballot, is the main representative of the Students' in the Senate meetings. This post, for very obvious reasons is a coveted one, and so strongly contested.

But this time around, it was different. There was a 3rd yearite contestant for the post who had belonged to Hall-2(during his 1st and 2nd year), but strangely enough, he didnt have a competitor from the rival hall(Hall-3). The post, it seemed, would go uncontested. But then, things took a dramatic turn when Shanky filed his nomination.

The students' were bewildered, it was for the first time in IITK history, that a 2nd yearite was contesting the post of Gymkhana elections. And then, unlike most past presidents, Shanky hadn't this flamboyant persona, or killer looks. The only he had was, a passion to change things at the Gymkhana, and, most definitely, guts.

Yes, guts. He was contesting against a third yearite, who certainly knew more people than he did. He didnt have any administrative experience, the other guy had been the president of Hall-5. Shanky had little, or maybe no support from the 3rd yearites, because they simply couldn't see a President from a junior batch. In short, his chances seemed bleak from the very beginning. But then he had his own positives too. From a personal point of view, Shanky wasn't just another classmate, he was one of the nicest people I had come across in my life. He was always there when I needed him, and when there was no one else to help me (like when a couple of days before an exam, I had to visit a doctor, and no-one else wanted to accompany me. Everyone wanted to prepare for the exams). The others knew it too. But the question was, Is it enough for a person to be nice and caring and passionate to be the Gymkhana President. I didnt know.

Shanky, many moons ago, had wanted to stand for the Hall President's post (Hall = Hostel at IITK). The guys in my wing told him they would support him, and then made fun of him behind his back. I knew they wouldnt vote for Shanky, and envisaged a crushing defeat for Shanky. A very embarassing defeat. Somehow I and another friend had managed to talk Shanky out of it. But this time, I was all with him. It didnt matter if no one voted for him, we would campaign, and we will try.

We campaigned for Shanky. We went to various hostels, talked to people, distributed pamhlets, got into arguments, and so on. It was obvious that we were making an impact, and Shanky as the ambitious second-yearite who wanted to be the President was certainly making waves.

After the voting day, at around midnight, I walked into Shanky's room. The results were to be declared the following morning, and I expected Shanky to be pretty nervous. But on the contrary, I found him to be in an upbeat mood. The main reason for this visit was to tell him that I was sorry I had discouraged him from contesting the post of Hall President, and that it didnt matter now if he won or lost.

"Hi Shanks...." I said, and smiled as I entered his room
"Oh hi...." he returned a bigger smile
"Nervous?" I asked, though he didnt look like it
"Arre nahin yaar. Kya he. I wanted to try, and that I did. Thanks for all the support yaar"
"oh. wo sab to theek hai....lekin I wanted to tell you that..."
"It doesnt matter now yaar. I mean, dekho, mujhe Gymkhana President ka bahut man tha, aur maine koshish ki. Ab kya sochna ki kya hoga mera, jo hoga dekha jayega"

I looked at him for a minute, bewildered by the sudden realisation that Shanky had been repeating something I had always believed in. The philosophy being that if there is something one really wants to do, then one should do it. Shanky, by all means, was really wanting to be the President. To him it didnt matter that he didnt have the experience, or the support, but he tried. To be at peace with himself, and peace, he had now found.

I was happy for him. I didnt say what I had wanted to say. It didnt matter now.

The visit

2006-03-20T04:23:00.000-08:00

I never liked hospitals. This inspite of my dad being a doctor. My mom wanted me to be a doc too, but that was way too much to expect from me, didnt she know that doctors work in HOSPITALS.

But then, once in a while we have to do things we dont like, going to a hospital (!!). Dad had talked to the surgeon, and everything was ready, except ofcourse the patient. Its scary enough walking the corridors of a hospital, and well, this was about a visit to the operation-theatre. Enough to make me vanish into thin air, but then I couldnt do that (no one can, except those weirdos in the Harry Potter books)

I couldn't eat, and I couldnt sleep.
"They are going to put you on G.A." Dad said, trying his "medico" best to assail my fears.
"Genetic Algorithms" was what sprung into my mind, but the little reasoning I had been gifted with, was quick to convince me it wasn't that. It had to be General Anaesthesia (the one which puts you to sleep, while the docs tinker with your body). That, to the troubled soul of mine, was pretty comforting, atleast I wouldnt know what they would do to me. But the aftermath, I knew very well from experience, was going to be painful. It would be only a matter of time, before the GA wore out....

But GA it was, and I was happy it wasnt the more insane LA (Local A.). 'neways, me, mamma and dad reached the hospi in the early hours of the morning. Nice big place it was, the silence very disturbing indeed. I hate silence, I really love noises. Of people bustling about, of laughter, of running taps. The total absence of any such noise was pretty disquieting. But well, I had to wait, the surgeon wouldnt be there till about 8.

"S....." she called me, the nurse that is. I got up, rather slowly, my fears vivid in my eyes. I looked at mom, she mirrored my fears. I wasn't the only one scared. Not very good.

"Com'on quick" Dad said, I could barely hear him now. The doc probably wouldnt even need the GA , I will probably faint the moment they put me on the bed. But I hadnt fainted, till I reached the O.T. They gave me special slippers, and threw me a gown.
"Wear that" growled a man dressed in green, his face hardly visible. They had given me a green gown too.
"Some fascination with the darned colour" I thought.
I got into the changing room. All my clothes, I tucked into a little shelf that had "PATIENT's Clothes" written on it. Nice arrangement, I told myself.

I took up this green gown. The quirky little thing had no buttons. Yes, no God-damn buttons. I had been to an OT earlier, but that was like years ago, and I didnt quite remember what I had done that time around. But well, I sure could figure it out. I was from IIT after all.....

I put it on. I had a queer feeling that something wasn;t quite right. Maybe thet gave me a gown that was damaged, maybe. But anyways, I had to be ready then, as my doc had arrived. I got out of the place.

Two nurses (both in "green" dresses) approached me.
One of them, rather plump, and other pretty tall. Nice combo, I thought, Laurel and Hardy Women's edition, I chuckled to myself.
The plump woman barked something in Telugu.
"Uhh! English....orrr.......aaa...Hindi???" I stammered. They had to know one of them, I thought.
"No Telugu" the plump nurse's eyes widened as she said this. The tall woman wasnt impressed too.
She caught hold of the gown I was wearing, and said "Ulta.....ye ulta. Pichche tie.....aage nai".

It struck me like thunder. It couldnt be more embarassing. The gown, as I had mentioned had no buttons, only some laces on one side. One was supposed to wear it in a way that the laces were behind (on the back), and then tighetened. I had worn it the other way round, like a bathroom robe, and had tried in vain to cover my anteriors with those laces (oh yes, that was precisely why I had thought something to be wrong with it).

It was exasperating, to say the least. I went back to the changing room, red faced.

The rest as they say is history. The procedure turned out to be O.K. But, well, the lesson to be learnt was,
"If you don't know something, ASK. For God's sake, ASK !!!"

Contest fracas

2006-02-28T12:10:00.000-08:00

So Techkriti's (IITK's techfest) over, and I didnt get to win any prizes this time either.But I definitely had fun...how you ask? Here it is......

On the second day of Techkriti, which was Saturday, I walked into Maggu's room at around 7 PM. Maggu was doing something he did best, staring hopelessly at the ceiling.

"Kya be, kya chal raha hai", I asked.
"Abbey kisi bhi contest mein participate hi nahi kiya" he rued
"Schedule dekh saale, koi to contest hoga" I tried to comfort him, the repercussions of this little statement were soon going to be apparent, and disastrous!

Maggu swung into action, and withing minutes was going through the schedule page on the website. And he was bang on target.....

"On the Spot Programming Contest.....Prelims at 8...tonight" he squealed in delight.
"Arrghh!!" I thought to myself. I had participated in that one the last time around, and it had been nothing short of a disaster.
"Chal, isi mein chalte hain" Maggu said. I could see the glitter in his eyes. He really wanted to. And he had been participating in the online contests for sometime now, so it was pretty natural for him to want to try this one out too.
"theek hai, lekin teesra team-mate kaun" I asked, not sounding very enthusiastic.
"Dekhenge, chal done right. We are in" he said.
"...'K" was all I could bring myself to say

We went for dinner, Maggu in a jubiliated mood, and I, pensive. After the previous Techkriti's catastrophe I had grown rather weary of such contests. But well, one needs to keep trying, I thought trying to boost my own morale.At 8 PM, we reached the Lecture Hall Complex (LHC) where we had to answer a set of objective questions in Math and Programming to get thro to the actual programming contest which was on the next day. The third team mate was Kallu (Kallu also happened to be on my calamitous team of the previous year!!!)
So there we were, me,Muggu and Kallu. And 100s of other hopefuls. I will just say that we made it, to the next round.

And on Sunday, at 10AM, we were at the lab, ready to fight it out with 39 other teams, almost every other team better than us. The contest begun, we had 3 hours to attack 5 problems, some tough, some easy, and some simply weird. Maggu gave me the 1st one, the others he redistributed between himself and Kallu. It was a stroke of luck that I seemed to have laid my hands on one that was easy. It was the simple Towers of Hanoi problem, only that I had to find out the status on the pegs at some particular move. I thought for a probably a couple of minutes, and started coding almost instantaneously (big mistake!). Maggu saw that, and somewhat relieved that I had already started working, he and Kallu intensified their efforts on figuring out the other problems.

Probably an hour later, I had completed writing the program, and till this time no submissions had been made (I knew this because the sponsors had announced T-Shirts and Mugs for all correct submissions, and no one had won any till this time). I checked my program on the sample inputs, it seemed to work, and I submitted my run.
"Wrong Answer" the system retorted, and we had been penalised twenty minutes for that.
"Kya hua" Maggu asked
"Nahin chala, Wrong Answer"
"Use theek karo, Jaldi" Maggu shrieked
"hmmmmm.....kar raha hoon" I said.
It was Deja vu now. The last time around, me, Kallu and a third guy had solved one, and it hadn't been accepted, and I had submitted the same program 8 times in sheer frustration(can you imagine that, eight submissions of the same incorrect program in a row). And well, as is obvious we had no correct submissions at the end of the day, and had been penalized 160 minutes for the wrong programs. Was it going to happen again? I shuddered at the thought.

I slowly got back to the program. I could gradually see people winning T-Shirts and mugs....they were solving things. The team just beside us, was also attacking the same problem. I could hear "Stacks", "Pegs" in their muffled voices. I wanted to submit my program before they could, and it was natural too, I had been working longer on the same one.

At around 12 (two hours had passed), I heard a loud scream of "YES!!" from the guy sitting beside me. He had done it, and he was thrown a T-Shirt too. Maggu gave me that 'What-the-hell-r-u-doing' look, the one that makes you want to vanish into the wall closest to you.
"Kar raha hoon, kar raha hoon.....10 more mins" I pleaded
"Jaldi" Maggu growled
Kallu was saying nothing. Probably it was Deja Vu for my former team-mate as well. We had been through the trauma last time around.

I got back to the problem, and with a vengeance this time. But then IT happened, crippling all my new found determination in a matter of seconds.What happened, you ask. Well, somebody *farted*. And NO, this somebody didnt just fart, and be done with it, he went on a farting spree (the same kind of sprees you can on UT, I could kill this a *Killing* spree as well). The stench was horrible, could be likened to the gases Hitler's armies used (oh yes, I AM exaggerating, but I am not VERY far from the truth either). This was the end of all. My frustration with the god-damn program, and then this person going on a farting orgy was the final nail in the coffin.
"Kya kar rahe ho, program kyon nahi kar rahe ho" Maggu almost screamed into my ears.I was stunned. How could he not to feel it, the stench was all around. "Was it him who had caused this?" I wondered....half amused, half bewildered.
"Huh" I murmured, every bit of my face displaying utter confusion.
"Chod tu, we will try the next one", with this he closed my program, and took charge of the keyboard.
And this precisely was the end of my participation in the contest. Maggu took control of the keyboard, and the next 45 minutes he spent in looking up for some C++ documentation that had been provided (instead of programming!!) I kept looking all around me, trying to find out who the culprit was, for farting at that crucial moment was a sin...it really was.
"15 minutes to go" an organiser howled.
"Its over" Kallu said, finally.
"Shit....." Maggu yelped, dejected.

Maggu pushed the keyboard away, he had accepted defeat. And I was back at it. This time I really went for it, I couldnt let things be repeated all over again, I didnt want them to.I looked at my program again, and surprise!! I actually found a bug. I sorted it out, and submitted again.
"5 minutes to go" the same idiot howled again. He didnt know we had watches.

"Runtime Error" the system responded. It was certainly an improvement over "Wrong Answer", but well, it only meant the answer hadnt still been accepted as yet.I was desperate now, and then, I repeated my mistake of the past, out of unmitigated anger this time. I submitted it three times in a row, the same program that is.

As we walked out of the contest, with around 4 wrong submissions, and 3 submissions that had a runtime error, the only thing I could find solace was in that atleast this time I didnt submit 8 times as in the previous year (I had submitted the erroneous code only 7 times, so thats a 140 minutes penalty!!!). And well, the farter, the guy lives till the day I lay my hands on him....

The guy in the library

2006-02-18T07:51:00.000-08:00

I am regular at the library. On any given day one can find me in the library anytime after 9pm (occasionally, even before that!!).

At the time of the exams, one finds almost everyone at the library. The 10-pointer revising his books for maybe the 10th time, the 9 pointers dreaming of the 10 that they might just score, and the 5 pointers ofcourse, trying their best not to fail. The larger majority, however lies somewhere in between. The only thing that seems to bind one and all at this juncture, is the library, and its petrifying atmosphere during the exams season.

A few, however, visit the library even when there are no exams/quizzes round the corner. I happen to be one such guy. In the week that the exams are over, most guys play tennis, football, or, just do nothing. But me, well, I go to my favorite spot in the library, on the 2nd floor, pick up a nice magazine, and while away my time in the nicest of ways. Occasionally, to stretch my legs, I get up, and go on a tour of the place. The motive usually being able to catch a glimpse of some cute fresher girl, or better still, some MTech bombshell. Sadly enought, inspite of my consistent visits to the place, I rarely get to see any beauty in motion. It was on one such excursion, however, that I saw him. He wasn't handsome by any means, rather rotund, and very shabby as well. He wore dark jeans, and a T-shirt, carelessly unbottoned. Only later would I associate this outfit with the guy, after I had realised the monotonicity with which those clothes clung to him.
He wore glasses, like most of my batchmates. I didn't know if he was in my class, but then, classes here are big, so that was an excuse I had. The only similarity I fancied we had, was the propensity to sit in the same area in the library, every single day.

Gradually as time passed, and I became aware of his continued presence, I started noticing more interesting things about him. We seemed to walk into the place at around the same time everyday, around a quarter past eight, and neither left before the librarian had rung the second closing bell, which was at around a quarter to twelve. The chubby guy had a very systematic way of doing things. He always came in with a cell-phone, his wallet, and a bunch of keys. He wouldn't sit down till the time he had taken these things out of his pocket, and laid them on a corner of his table. He would then place his books (I never saw him issuing books from the reserve section, he almost always had his own textbooks), sit down, and start studying.

Once I showed him to Maggu, one of my rather regular partners during my library excursions.

"the flubby guy, look at him. He comes everyday" I said
"So do we," winked Maggu
"Yes of course, but hes so methodical"
"I dont know, and I dont care"
"Is he in Computer Science", I asked him
"I dont know", said Maggu, rather disdainfully
Maagu didnt seem interested in the conversation, and so I ended it. This was the only time I talked about him to anybody, until much later, when Maggu and me would talk about him again.

I never thought I would talk to him. For one, I hadnt seen anyone ever talk to him, and he seemed rather unfriendly to be fair to everyone else too. But then fate had its way. Our 2nd midsems were over, and in the evening I was back at the library. Clutching copies of the New Yorker, as I was walking towards my favorite seat, I saw him, poring over a Thermodynamics textbook.
"So hes in thermo" I thought. I was doing the same course, but never had seen in class. Maybe I never looked for him.
I had walked past his table several times in the past, and never cared to look, or stop. But, this time it was different. I stopped just short of his table. And he looked up at me, the look not uncongenial, but rather warm.
"Hello" I said. My voice somewhat unsure.
"Hi. You are in thermo too right" he said, as his face broke into a big disarming smile.
"Ohhh.yes" I was ashamed, he had noticed me in class, and I am no ten pointer, no patakha girl, nothing. But he had still noticed me.
"But why are you studying thermo now" I asked. I couldnt understand why someone should hold on to the book even on the day the exams were over.
"I didnt too well in it. What abt you?" his eyes seemed to pop as he asked the question, but the smile was still there, maybe he wanted to talk abt my performance, rather than his. Maybe he wanted to talk about better things.....
"chal forget it. chalta rehta hai yaar. Exams, quizzes...." I shrugged
"haan, chalta hai" he seemed to be consoling himself. I didnt want to stand there any longer, as I was not sure of what to say next. So I bid goodbye, and walked away.

In the days that followed, no, we didnt become good friends or something. But somehow, we regarded each other rather differently. We smiled amply at each other, sometimes nodded in greeting. We were no longer strangers. Something had crumbled between us. He was no longer the shabby boy in the jeans, he was someone I knew I would always find sitting in the same corner in the library, deeply engrossed in his book. Someone who would give me nice smile when I chanced to look at him.

I must say that he worked hard, very hard. During the end-sems, while I left at around midnight (the library opens 24 hours then), he always stayed back. I imagined he worked twice as hard during the exam days, but well, I never knew. Because of inspite of the little conversation we had, and all the nods and flutters that we gave one another, we never talked. Something stopped us, and I dont know what it was.

After the end-sems, I went home. On the day I came back to the hostel, Maggu walked into my room..
"Pata hai be, teen logon ki termi lag gayee is sem" he announced
Termination (or popularly termi) is the process when an academically non-performing student is "thrown-out" of IIT. Terminated.
"Kis-kis ki" I enquired
"XXX, YYY aur us mote ki" he answered rather nonchalantly.
"Kis mote ki" I queried rather restlessly, Magru had caught my attention
"Arre wohi, jeans waala mota. Jise tune lib mein dikhaya tha be"
"Ohhh! But he was working so hard"
"It doesnt matter. He wasnt scoring" said Maggu, smiling.
I continued to stare at him, stunned at what I had just heard.
"Abbe wo bekaar tha. Thermo mein bhi fakka kha gaya" Maggu added, now unable to mask the contempt in his voice.
"Ohh..". This was all I could get myself to say. Maggu thought he was "bekaar" because he had failed in a course that is considered easy by most of my classmates. He had failed in three other courses as well. Maggu probably couldnt accept such duds as his classmates. But how was I to tell him that he wasnt "bekaar". I will never forget the cherubic smile the guy in the perenially dark jeans had, and all the pain the smiles hid.
I knew I would never see him again. And I dont want to. Because I wouldnt know what to say then. He is better off living somewhere, where the "usefulness" of an individual isn't measured on a 10-point scale.

Wanderings of a lost mind

2006-02-16T12:21:00.000-08:00

"So whats appearing on it now", he asks me, his eyes wide and anticipating
"I dont know....something"
"What do you mean something? How can you write just something?"
"Ahh..well....."
"Look, just tell me what the plot is. That’s all I am interested in"
"Why dont you find it out"
"Let me guess"
"Sure....why not. A 100 million inane games are played on the planet every single day. So why not one more? A novel “Guess-It” game"
"Bah..what was that. Literary gimmick. Publicity stunt. You arent doing yourself a favor that way. I hope you know that"
"What happened to your guessing?"
"You are ridiculing me…. Are you”, the menace in the voice now palpable.
"Nooooo...noooooooo" my voice rings aloud, in a sing-song, that is enough to drive him crazy
"I just need a glimpse" he says.
"Of my beautiful face is it?" the grimace on my face, oops, if only I could describe his irritation
"Yeah of your beautiful face, so I could write a sonnet in its praise"
"Hahahahaha.......how much I want someone to do that"
"I am the ONLY person who reads your silly blog. Do I need to remind you of that?"
The final blow. The little game's over.
"Well of course, yes, but...." I try to gather my thoughts, with little success.
"Yes...go on.", all smiles, my intimidator is
"Ah sure....you DO read the blog" I say, but well I am losing already
"And who else does. Come on...lay a wager on that now....if you dare"
"Ok. maybe someone else does too" Am I really trying to convince myself?
"And this someone is..." my mind is rambling already, am I listening, or am I speaking. I dont know.
"He is named NO ONE is he"
"Maybe he is....."
"M..a..y..b..e.."
"Enought. Get on with your studies......"
"Yeah...I will."
"So why dont you" I give him the big-bull stare
"Once you tell me what the plot is.....of that new posting you are trying to make"
"YOU ARE THE PLOT" I answer with the utmost conviction
"And YOU are the JOKE" says he, happy to have eventually ended it his way

A follow up

2006-02-05T10:21:00.000-08:00

Cal's argued pretty often that I am rude, and wudnt think twice before shooting my tongue off. As a matter of factly, I wouldn't even think once, talk of twice!! The genesis of this phenomenon can be traced back to, ummmm, let me think, maybe to the time I was 10 years old, or was I still younger. I can pump in a lot of incidents here, that have more or less been a direct consequence of my rash behaviour, but for one thing thats certain, I can trace all of this back to a long long time ago. I am sure details wouldnt interest my reader, and that is the singular reason why one wont find a discourse on that in this post. And further, it will be potentially embarassing and demeaning to me. But it shall come, on this very blog. Now that shall be some form of redemption, I guess.

And aha, my roomie says why debate, or create controversies on a blog when you know your reader is nothing more than an apparition. Somehow I cannot agree. A lot of people have written for the mere sake of it, the fact that it may never be read matters so little. Somewhere in the back of the writer's mind there is this intense yearning to be read, and appreciated. But with that, is the constant fear of being obliterated, being consigned to oblivion, pushed into the teeming masses, and then forgotten for ever. It is in between these conflicting ideas, that creation occurs. For nothing, but the love of it. Scientists have experimented for the very same reasons, men of adventure have fought bitter battles for this, and so, it shall continue. Everything isnt destined to rot away in the filthy dustbins of time. There are things that shall live for ever.

And yes, after I wrote the previous post, I went back and looked at some blogs run by my classmates. Diaries after diaries filled with the most mundane and banal happenings at a place called IIT. I really wonder how they do it. Ohh no, I am not the sardonic blogger here, and am in no way saying that mine is the way to blog, just that it is pretty difficult, if not impossible to do such inane postings on ones blog. Ony few can, and yes, only few are doing it, and lets thank the almighty for that. Personally I look at my blog as a personal diary, as versus a comic strip on the 'whats happening on the campus' stuff. Or the whos smooching whom, and as a result of that someone else's bottom's on fire. And of course, there's even discussion on the --near-- absence of the female 'species' on the campus....and how the junta craves that most primal of animal instincts...... hohohooo. Think of garbage, and chances are you either find it on an IITians blog, or one of those puerile postings on certain IIT mailing lists. Dont believe me....umm well, maybe I should start linking to some such amazing blogs, but that would be heresy, so I must refrain. For the sake of my own little blog should I say !!!

There however was one blog that I liked for its postings that were sensible, and interesting. Sadly, the writer has decided to abandon the blog, for not very apparent reasons. Hope the blog gets back on wheels, and then I can link to that blog, and probably start a bigger discussion (read "Debate") on things very close to my heart (these kind of statements of mine often have some people in splits, and others frowning or deeply annoyed!! Things that I am passionate about often appear tiresome to others, bizarre isnt that?)

Well, keep watching this space my "phantom" reader, there's a lot of adventure that awaits you......hehe

bye
the masquer

Back

2006-02-04T22:19:00.000-08:00

Long time, no new posts. Time to get back to some of the *more* important things in life. I have already finished an exam, had about a couple of days to chill out, and am finally blogging...........

I really wonder what brought me back here, but certain things are better left unexplained, my blogging for instance. I am currently reading the Alchemist, it was sent to me by a close friend. I am enjoying the book, its full of truisms should I say? Things that everyone knows, in a way or another.

Blogs are out of vogue on the campus these days. More fashionable things have taken over, for no obvious reasons (well maybe the only one being that it is a bit tedious to compose/maintain a blog!!!). I am yet yo find to discover the latest fad on the campus, but given the fact that this campus is inhabited by tiresomely dull and tedious people, I dont expect things to have become much more colorful or fanciful. Things just die their un-natural deaths here. And the only thing that survives is the boredom, the mechanical life that is as purposeless as anything can be, and that drags on and on.

Anyways, entire blogs can be devoted to this, but for the time being, I will keep things in a slightly different perspective. Maybe I will be clearer, and straight forward a little later. To paint the big picture, one needs more time, that very precious commodity.....

C ya soon,
the masquer

Dropped, and then CAUGHT

2005-12-27T22:44:00.000-08:00

Being a part of a very *civilised* and plural society, I found it rather hard to understand Cal's argument that its only the Bengalis who are crying their lungs out on Ganguly the Great's dropping from the Indian Cricket Team, but with the passing of time, the idea's only winning me over. It seems like one of those ethereal facts, that shreaking masses of humanity have denied time and again, in some of the most unavailing attempts in mankind's history. But as they say ' The truth shall prevail '. In short, the naked truth is that Ganguly just didnt deserve to be part of the Indian side any longer, and that at no point of time where there any ethnic/linguistic aspects to the question. The writing on the wall was clear, but people sometimes like befooling others into thinking that they are blind. Educated men and women with 20/20 eyesight, who still can't read, or understand, or think, beyond petty street-level power struggles.
Well, Ganguly's back, and Kolkata's happy, so I think that settles it. But does it?
For one, it has exposed the hypocrisy and deceit that has become an inseparable part of Indian Cricket. It has set a precedent, that will only mutate into more vicious forms in the days to come, and the fan's of the game will be reduced to mute spectators in a drama that is more political than sportive.
I bid adieu to Indian Cricket, as I, and a lot of my countrymen knew it.

P.S. :- I would only appreciate critical remarks on the above write-up. In case you have a strong urge to use bad language, you might rather hurl all your abuses at a nearby wall.
Thanks!

I am Back, not with a bang though

2005-12-27T11:53:00.000-08:00

I am back to where I truly belong. So far the going has been good, only that a friend of mine has gone missing. Everyone's a bit worried, but something tells me the guys fine, whereever he is, because he is not the kind someone would have the heart to hurt. I bet he will be back soon. Back to where he belongs, like the rest of us.
Registered yesterday, recharged the phone, even roomie's back. Roomie's damn happy, he got exactly what he wanted on his grade sheet. The rest of the junta is doing fine. Another friend of mine is in a bit of academic trouble, but he is doing everything he can to sort it out with the insti.

Because nothing much has happened, and its pretty late and I am tired, I think I will leave this right here. I sure expect a lot of action in the days to come, and this blog sure is going to have it all...the good, the bad, the ugly. So keep watching this space (as the silly magazines keep saying!!!)

Oopsie, its out

2005-12-20T06:58:00.000-08:00

Its official now, our CPIs i.e. Well not exactly, maybe a good 24 hours to go before I get to know. But damn it, who cares. Some people in my wing are having a rocking time now, others just doing the same old shit, staring at the ceiling (and that never caves in, not that we want it to). Wish I could write something better, but I really can't. Atleast not until I know for sure, how badly I got screwed in the semester. As a blogger friend says, semesters begin and end with, guess what, resolutions. I kind of agree with that, nothing seems to change. Only that we move on to bigger (and worse) new courses. Someone telling me 'thats life buddy, you got to face it'. Maybe!
I cant think of anything else that I might want to spill here. But a lot of excitement around me these days, and well reader, a little wait, and you will know. For know, if you got nothing better to do, I dont know, maybe you should check some other blog, where the author has something to tell you. And then you can tell me about it, putting in a link in the comments, sounds fun. I get it. This is what I should be doing, instead of writing all this trash on my blog. But then I seem to even enjoy this. By the way reader, you might like this one --> www.futureme.org
This cute little website lets you send mail to yourself, in the future. So write down anything that will sure sound very nostalgic when you read it years later. Kind of funny. Check it out.
Byeee

Getting back to life

2005-12-19T08:21:00.000-08:00

Soon I will catch a train back to the University. Lots of new courses, and lot of new things to be tried out.
I have a new Mp3 player, and am damn excited about it. Its slick and sexy. I am putting in my favorite songs into it.
These holidays were extremely boring. I didnt go on my long drives, because of two reasons. 1) My car stereo wudn't work. 2) Su wasn't here. The more important reason though is the car stereo, I could have gone all alone. I did make one trip though, with M. I went to the same place, by the river. I could hear the water gurgling, and the place always reminds of me the conversation that took place there, a few years ago. I wouldnt write about it at this juncture, because the waiting period is still not up. But it will come up here, as things that happened around that time, shaped the real me. They were defining, to put things rather lightly.
I miss a lot of people very badly now, not to mention Su. Life suddenly got very lonely, but that is the way things stand, and I have got to accept it. M was real nice to me, always having something to tell me, something very secretive. But M's secrets wudn't make very interesting reading, though parts of it might be fun, if nothing else.
I am itching to get back to the only kind of life I have now, at the Uni. Things would be different once I get there. There's something at the river that haunts me. And I dont want to face it for too long. There are questions that demand answers, and I am too scared to look at them.
I will come back, when I have something a little more meaningful to talk about. But I am sure, there are some people out there who will know what I am talking about, but fortunately enough, they dont read this blog of mine. So in a sense, the devil's not looking for me as yet, but sooner than later it will. And then I can't hide any longer ! But till then, I will have fun.

Help with the FORM ?

2005-12-12T05:18:00.000-08:00

I had a young visitor at my place yesterday. He had just written his 9th standard English midterm. I just couldnt help thinking of this little something, that happened a long time ago (and well, not to me).

I was in the 11th standard then, and had some examination that day. We used to sit with 9th standard students, 7th grade sat with 5th, 10th with 8th, and so on, you get the idea, right. 3 hour long examinations were always a pain in the neck. I used to finish off my papers in the first couple of hours, passively skipping questions I couldn't immediately answer. Because they were internals, I rarely made an extra effort to answer any such questions later.

I was done with my exam, as usual, while there were still about half an hour to go. There used to be this babe in my class (my best friend had told me she was doing someone, but well, who cares), and I was pleasantly engrossed in one of my favorite hobbies. In the cavernous depths of my mind, lies hidden a girl center. And part of this extensive setup, is a video facility. The only reason it exists is, so I could imagine women naked. The pretty chick was in there at the moment, as my systems busily worked to recreate her nude, and I tell you reader, the experience was titillating to say the least. I suddenly felt an elbow nudging me. Damn, all of the video was gone, replaced by the darn blue screen we sometimes find on our TVs when the signal's gone.

The culprit was the cheeky 9th standard boy sitting beside him. He winked. "Whats it" I growled. He pointed at a question on his paper. Oops, he wanted help. I looked at his answer sheet, he was just on the third page, so it was evident he wasnt very well prepared. But, well. "MY HELP?" Did the kid know my repo at school? Probably he never walked the corridor that had the princi, and vice princi's room, or he couldn't possibly have missed me. Not a week passed without me, and my friends, being called up into the torture chamber, for thingswe steadfastly claimed we hadn't done. Inspite of the evidence almost always being circumstantial we were always nailed, getting to spend the rest of the work-day kneeling (and standing!) outside the princi's room. This little guy, either knew and didn't care, or best of all, he probably had no idea of the kind of the person he was sitting with.

I said, "Ok, let me read the question.", keeping my voice low so that we didnt attract attention. It only helped that we were seated on the last bench, while the invigilator sitting in the front of the class straddled the boundary between sleep, and deep sleep.
It was an English paper he was answering. The question he was pointing at required him to create (and fill) an application form for a mountaineering expedition. Ahh well, I was happy it wasnt a social science paper, with all those difficult questions that noone remembered the answers to after the exam. "I will dictate, just write. And mind you, DONOT look at me"
"Thanks" he said. He actually sounded grateful.

I started dictating. All the standard things done, it was time to do the personal details section.

"Name"
He wrote down the word name on his answer script, and waited.
"Write your fucking name" I muttered under my breath.
He quickly wrote it down. The dumb-ass.
"Age"
He wrote down both the word 'age', and also his actual age, without my intervention. Good, he was learning it.
"Sex"
He wrote it down, very slowly. And then, to my astonishment, just stopped. It struck me, probably his teacher has taught him 'Gender', and not 'Sex'. I am sure if the kid would have turned around to look at me, he couldn't have missed the twinkle in my eyes.
"Yes. Write Sex:Yes"
He wrote it down. I was making an insane effort to suppress a guffaw.
I helped him with the rest of the form. No more spices there. The bell then rung, and very meekly he said "thank you".
"My pleasure"
As I walked out of class that day, I couldnt imagine the look on his teacher's face, when he reads an application of a 15yr old amateur mountaineer, who expected to have sex on his maiden expedition.
I never met the guy again.

Inter-Disciplinary IS IN, traditional is on its way out

2005-12-10T08:47:00.000-08:00

In a previous post I had commented upon the fact that IITs should encourage inter-disciplinary research and to do this, should allow students to choose from a variety of courses, as versus straight-jacketing them into traditional areas of science and technology. Some of my friends thought otherwise (as is obvious from the comments), and that one should concentrate on 1 area, and not dabble in too many different disciplines. They very obviously didn't get the point.

I can prove my point, but they would still argue, telling me that when the revered professors at IITs framed the curriculum, they had our best interests in their minds. But there's something called 'inertia'. Things in this country never change on their own, do they? They change only when they become completely untenable.

It was a mere coincidence that my technews supplement carried an article on this very thing. Please read (in the link) why Professor Jon Kleinberg from Cornell University thinks inter-disciplinary work is in...and traditional out.
To Quote him

To take some simple examples, consider the interface of biology with materials science (the latter being a hybrid field already), or computer science with psychology and the social sciences. This is an issue that many large organizations -- universities, companies, government funding agencies -- are wrestling with. To the extent it's possible, it's important to avoid worrying too much about how to classify current research activities into standard disciplinary categories, and rather to draw on whatever expertise is needed in the pursuit of important research problems.

The idea is yes, one needs the core-knowledge, sure. But then, if the students didn't do courses from other departments during their undergraduate years, it will get only more difficult to come to grips with whats happening on the frontiers of science and technology in the later part of their lives. Multifarious programmes are all set to revolutionise Science and Engineering education, why do we want to be left behind. And then, in a very nice way, this also solves the major wallah lafda. More choices, better outputs, and then the added thrills of having hands-on work on the latest technologies and ideas.

Heres the link.
http://www.trnmag.com/Stories/2005/120505/View_Jon_Kleinberg_120505.html
He talks about Science and Tech combos I could never have dreamt of. Its amazing the way the arena is changing. But well, as a rather jocose comment on my blog says that IITs are not social organisations (really, so why the hell is the state financing it then?) and hence have no obligations to the country, or its students, I reckon the IITs would give the whole inter-disciplinary thing the 'fuck-this-shit' kinda look, wouldnt they? When their well-designed engineering and science programs are already attracting the country's best talent (Damn it! Did someone have a second option?) so why try changing it? Why take the pain?

All said and done, I have tried my best to put things into the right perspective. Its the need of the hour to focus on multi-disciplinary approaches to solve the world's hardest problems. IITs can be at the fore-front of technology now, only if we believed in our potential. Only if we tried to change.

Choosing Majors

2005-12-09T06:49:00.000-08:00

Both Harshvardhan (on his blog) and Rsenic (in the comments on my blog), have suggested a system where students choose their majors after the 1st year at IIT, and not on the basis of their JEE ranks (given that the JEE in its current form, is in no way an indicator of a student's abilites).

But wait a minute, assuming for a minute an arrangement wherein students take the JEE merely as an entrance examination(i.e. to gain entrance into an IIT), and select their Majors depending on their performance in their first years, there arise some questions that need to be answered.

First, let us see what students are taught in the first year. Most engineering and science courses at IITs, have the typical Phy-Math-Chem kind of an intro in the first couple of semesters. There are substantial variations though, like for e.g., IITM has Chem in the 1st sem, but at IITK one doesnt get to suffer due to it till the 3rd sem. Similiarly, at Madras, students have to do the ManPro lab in the 1st sem itself, but at Kanpur, depending on your particular branch, you may not have to enter a machine lab till your 4th semester. But lets focus on the Phy-Math-Chem thing that almost all Engineering courses have (not just at IITs, but Universities across the country). One typically takes a course on Calculus, one on Mechanics, and maybe another on chemistry. Apart from these, one does courses like Engineering Drawing, Electronics, and an intro to Computer Programming.

So, then if one's 1st year performance was taken to be the criteria for branch allocation, we would run into rough weather again. Because for one, the students are being judged on mostly Math and Phy again, because the rest of the courses (and their syllabi) might vary widely at different IITs. Additionally, what I am missing here is the fact that all IITs are Universities in their own right, and have different judging methodologies, and one cant compare IIT x's grading with IIT y. We cant ensure that students are being rated on the same scale.

Even if there was someway to do that, it still wouldnt solve the problem of choosing the right major. Why? Because one year at IIT, isnt enought to know your own department, forget others.

"Passionate about Computers", or "always wanted to study Electrical Engineering" is pure crap. What do 18-19 year olds know about Chemical Engineering, and what about Ocean Engineering.....NOTHING. And believe me reader, one year down the line you will still know very little. One starts getting a hang of things in, I think the 3rd semester, when the departmentals start. By the end of the 2nd year, students know just what they have got themselves into! And sadly enough, theres no turning back then. Getting an A in a programming course doesnt prove there's a talented geek hiding in you, just as a couple of As in the Math 10x courses doesnt mean you will enjoy writing a thesis on topological spaces. The counselling (post JEE) cant help, and your first year performances might only prove you as talented, but cant really tell you what you might enjoy as your profession. Hitting the Jackpot, and scoring the perfect 10, might help you realise your childhood dream of studying computer science, only to realise an year later that you could have enjoyed more Physics than the nasty Math you have hiding in CS.

So whats the solution. I think increasing the flexibility of the existing programmes might be the answer. The students cant decide, because they lack information, are too young, and whatever. So they will commit mistakes when it comes to choosing a major. However, allowing greater inter-disciplinary programmes wherein students have the option of trying out different courses, from different departments will definitely prove to be beneficial in the long run. As of now, very few programmes have this kind of flexibility (CS has a lot of flexibility, but Mechanical Engi has almost none, for e.g.). Only one IIT (Kharagpur) offers Minors (though friends tell me it usually doesnt work out, because of time clashes in the courses) apart from the chosen Major of the student. IITK has a system of Open Electives in place, but anyone who's ever had to exercise this choice can tell you the hell you would have to go through to merely register in a course of your choice (I say "merely" because one still has to sort out the time clashes after registration inorder to actually do the course!). Apart from all of this, the IITs need to make an effort to encourage inter-disciplinary projects on campus, like Phy and Electrical, Math and Computers, Chem and Bio, and so on. IITK has woken upto the importance of UG research only recently, hope they understand the importance of what I have talked about here only sooner.

see you,
the masquer

PS :- Check out this link, to read more on choosing majors.
http://www.cse.iitk.ac.in/users/dheeraj/personal/counsel.html
Its on the home page of Dr Dheeraj Sanghi, a professor of Computer Science at the IIT Kanpur. Dr Sanghi gives some invaluable advice on what one needs to do after clearing the JEE. Insightful reading for every IIT aspirant.

A few important insights

2005-12-06T12:32:00.000-08:00

To strengthen my JEE idea, I am posting a few lines from some very relevant blogs.

A final year student of IIT B, Vijay N., hanged himself in his room sometime in November '05. The following lines have been taken from his close friend Harsha Vardhan's blog (http://www.livejournal.com/users/harsha_vardhan/2793.html).

So who is to blame for this?His parents ? Himself? IIT Authorities?Everybody has equal share in his plight..Parents were critical about his bad grades. He made things worse for himself. He couldn't choose between Academia & Computers. And as far as IIT Authorities are concerned, the recruitment of students into IIT has to change. Untill and unless, the option of choosing a branch post-IIT-first-year is implemented, students like NUKE will suffer.. He simply hasn't liked studying physics. His death should open the authorities eyes and they should consider, increasing the flexibility 'to change' branches. All said and done, that wouldn't happen.. would it?Ppl who clear JEE are highly talented . Yet, they some how find themselves in a loosing position which is quite alien to them. Most of ppl were toppers in their own schools. But when such a lapse occurs, IIT authorities should take care of such students and they have to nuture them. Mebbe sth like a psychiatrist might do some good to improve the mental health of such students.

I have only edited the piece in the sense that a few important lines have been highlighted. The reader might please note that the writer of the piece, who happens to have been a good friend of Vijay, clearly says how important the branch is. I might as well remind you that branches are solely decided by the JEE rank of the candidate. Oh! yes, some people get branch changes too, but that is probably only 1-2% of the total students. The remaining have to bear the brunt of the mistake....in JEE or during the counselling, whatever.

One might choose to ignore this suicide as an isolated case. However, a little deliberation shall soon convince the reader, that this is not true. Yes, a suicide might have been a bizarre incident, and thus singular. The majority of students in similiar situations will not follow suit, but lower motivational levels will only lead to lower productivity. In the long term, it will only harm the students, who incidentally, happen to be the country's creme-de-la-creme ! A bright student, in a department/course he is uninterested in, will have nothing to spur him to reach the heights of success, he otherwise could have. He will only do enough to get the passing grade, enough to just get by.

The IITs, cannot allow the kind of flexibility one sees at American/European universities for sure (or can they?), like for example being able to change your major without scoring the mandatory 10 (or 9.5). But, even in that case, the least they can do is make the JEE a real indicator of ones merit, give the students the best they can. And the only way to do this is making testing more all-encompassing. That might help atleast a smaller fraction of students to be able to take up a discipline, they want to. We can never optimise the system for everyone. So lets the help the best atleast.

If today we are smug, and maintain that the current recruiting system into the IITs (JEE) is flawless, then we would only be deceiveing ourselves.

bye
the masquer

The Debate.......Part 2

2005-12-06T09:23:00.000-08:00

In the previous post, I had talked about multiple testing in the JEE, as a possible system of increasing the probability of better students, getting better ranks. The current post, will dwell upon the various impracticalities the proposed system has.

In the system propounded by me, a student needs to write a total of 9 exams, to make it to an IIT. That according to people who oppose the idea, is extremely inconsiderate. The argument is, when the IITs spend so much time, effort, and most importantly money, in conducting the JEE, which in our days was only 6 hours long (with just 3 subjective papers), they just cant afford to manage, and conduct a national level examination that would have as many as 9 subjective papers. My belief is, they can. The CBSE can conduct the board examinations all over the country, and there are lots of papers there. And well, when I said 9 exams, I didn't mean that every JEE aspirant writes them, but only those students who clear a preliminary examination (the pre-2005 pattern again). This preliminary examination screens lets say, around 8000 students, who proceed into the next gruelling stage. At this level of the competition, they face 9 exams, on 3 consecutive days, and try to prove their worth.

The bone of contention now is the finances involved. But when so much is at stake, why think of mere money. We are talking about the aspirations of some of the country's brightest men and women, are finances more important than them? A person getting a poorer rank in the JEE (when he might have actually deserved a better rank) has the option of taking a better major at a lower ranked institution, claim my friends. Fine, yes. But well, isn't this a well known fact that the government spends crores on a few over-hyped institutions called the IITs, when many other important universities around the country are just rotting away because of lack of sufficient funds. This restricts the choices that the students can make, in the worst possible way. So once a person ''clears'' the JEE, he/she will, in the highest probability join an IIT, taking whatever branch his rank allows him. This makes it apparent, why the JEE should give the best possible chance to the student to prove his abilities. This is why the more comprehensive JEE format is better, as versus, the One-Day-Performance system that is currently in place.

The next point my opponents raised was the stress involved. They said, one exam gives the students so much of anxiety, a 3 day JEE, would probably kill them. This, dear reader, is an important issue. I think the students might like the system, if convinced that gives them better chances to go to an IIT, with ofcourse, the rank that they really deserve. But only they can say if its worth the extra pressures they will have to bear. A national level survey only can put things into perspective. We might even have the exams spread over a week, but the answer here, rests with the aspirants. So here, I will have to leave an open question.

The last and most important argument against the proposed system is this : "Let's for a minute assume that the IITs relent, and conduct the JEE in the new format, complete with a screening, followed by a demanding 3 day, 9 exam marathon. How many students will be really affected now....1%, 10%, 25% ? How many? How is it going to improve the student intake, if at all it does ? And well, in any case, the IITs are least bothered about the students who come in, the JEE is merely a rejection process. They just want a set of students, and the present system gives them that. Its working fine, so why mess with it?"

This one is pretty hard to answer. I donot know if 2% or 20% students will be affected. And I do not care. The entire idea is to give the students a better chance. Because a lot of students are involved, and because too much is at stake, and remembering that the JEE rank is all that determines the major one chooses, the system must give the students the best possible shot (at stardom!!!). And if the IITs aren't bothered about the students who come in, well, the state should stop funding them. The current system works, for sure. But it isnt the best system by any means. Come'on, its a lottery after a stage. Two questions wrong, and you are out of the race. It doesnt matter how much you knew, it only matters how much you scored in just one day. The current JEE system has been in place since the '90s, when the number of aspirants was a mere 25000 odd. As of now, close to 2 lakh students write the JEE, and we claim that the same system should work here too. Incredible. 10 years down the line, about 5 lakh people might compete for the IITs, and we will continue to argue that the same system should continue to work then too!

If 9 exams are stressful, then well, lets bring on the variations. Lets make it 2 best of 3, so one might drop one exam if he/she is confident enough of the previous performances. Or else, we can have different examination formats. Example : On the first day, one writes a 3 hour objective paper, comprising of questions in Math,Phy and Chem. On the third day, one gets to write a 3 hour subjective paper, and finally on the 5th day, aspirants face a 6 hours(with breaks) long arduous subjective examination. Marks obtained on all the three days will then be taken into consideration to make the final merit list. One shouldn't make absurd arguments now that why just one 3 hr long objective exam, and so on. Simply because we cant have hundreds of exams, doesnt mean we shouldnt even consider the 3 exam idea.

This post has been extremely long, but it couldnt be helped. I will add more to it very soon. I plan to put forth some more variations, and refinements to the proposal. And of course, answers to some more unanswered questions.

so till then
goodbye,
the masquer

Vacations.....continuing

2005-12-05T09:58:00.000-08:00

Well, I dont blog very often, but what do you do when you have lots of free time, and nothing good to do. I dont know what you do, but blogging is something I definitely do. This explains 2 posts in 2 days, doesn't it?
Nothing special today. Got up real late, and also got to see some more examination answer scripts. But, ahhh! its all over now. I can happily pack for home. Mom's waiting, and shes sooooooo excited. Dad's a bit sad because he will have to spend the larger part of the vacation away from me, hes going away on some training.
I haven't got much feedback from the girls demystified post as yet, and taking a wait-n-watch approach, I am not posting any continuations of the post. I am moving on to something different now, something more serious.
A few days ago, we had this big discussion on the JEE. Heres that discussion, in a much more condensed form.

Does the JEE really measure talent? I believe it doesn't. Its impossible to judge all a student has studied in two (or more) years, in just about 6 hours (this pertains to the pre 2005 JEEs, the pattern has now changed, and sadly, has only got worse). Its is essentially, a day's performance. I personally feel that the top 500 is occupied by bright, consistent students, and their JEE ranks may be taken to be a fair indicator of their abilities. However, when it comes to the lower ranks, lets say 1000+, there could be a complete shake-up if the students were asked to write another JEE. The students here, could then be anywhere.

Now reader, this was not what we debated upon. I argued that the present system could be improved, but my friends said "NO!!!"

My argument was that, to improve the probability of a good student coming into IIT with a rank he actually deserves (i.e. a fitting rank) he should be given more chances. A particular student might screw a paper, or even 2 of the 3 papers in JEE. But if the JEE tested him more comprehensively, by lets say a process that tests him thrice, wherein he is ranked depending on his performances in three consecutive tests, the chances of his getting the rank he deserves will be much higher. The reader might please note that when I say three JEEs, I actually mean a total of 9 tests (yes you read it right, NINE tests), three each in Math, Physics and Chemistry.

I asserted that a more exhaustive JEE (with multiple testing) will ensure that a greater number of the country's better students are lesser affected by chance. One bad day, wouldnt ruin their entire lives (in the sense that getting a poorer rank would only mean they would be forced to take up majors, that they have absolutely no interest in). Also recollecting that the Indian government spends lakhs of rupees on a handful of IITs, its apparent that the onus of selecting the best (and also the most highly motivated students) lies on the JEE (yes, I meant the Joint Admission Board).

This, reader, is just one side of the argument. The counter-attack was quick, and firm. To avoid making this a very long post, I shall take that half of the fight, into my next posting. I will also make some more pertinent points, and try to elaborate my line of reasoning in the same posting.

till then,
goodbye

the masquer

Girls...Demystified......

2005-12-04T04:27:00.000-08:00

So coming back to my social work (of helping insane lovers making forlorn attempts to make girl(s) realise how much they *love* them).

You think you love this girl. But then you also know you are such a dud, a born loser, who couldn't get laid even if a 100 sexy girls just dropped on you (you might be crushed to death instead!). What do you do then? If you have watched the movie Home Delivery , you might think I am some stupid moron who fantasises himself to be a gyaan guru, who could solve everybody else's big problems, while his own life is a total mess. Naaaah!!!! you would be wrong man. I really can give you an idea or two.........and can simultaneously assure you that they are tried-n-tested. But wait. No free lunches, right. You try then at your own risk. So if you find that your 'potential' girl-friend spews venom when you bark out the 'love-lines'(or better still, gives you a tight slap), God save you, dont sue me or something. So the conditions laid, its time to get down to business. Remember, tricks may/maynot work for you (really depends on how big a blockhead you are, but well, noone really knows why a girl choses one man over the other. I dont believe in the ludicrious Darwinian theory that women are driven by their natural instincts in choosing men, mating with men who would help them bear healthy offspring, which can keep the species alive and kicking. Because if this were true, then the IQ of the human species would only be decreasing, as it is the dolts who are most often chosen by the majority of women!!)

Technique 1
Introduction
You and the girl have known each other for quite some time. The girl calls you a good friend of hers (only God knows what girls mean when they say you are just a good *friend*). You think you love the girl (hahaha again only YOU know what you mean when you *love* the girl!!!!) Finally, after wriggling like hell with your fucking conscience, you decide to take the plunge. Tell her.....eh. Now this is where the technique comes in. How do you exactly do it?

Take her to pizza hut, order the most expensive pizza there, and then tell her after she has stuffed in 3/4ths of the pizza. If you just say you 'Love' her, that you are 'Mad' about her, in the highest probability she will say,

" -your name-- !!! What do you mean? I mean...ahh...arrrghhh, I thought we were just good friends. I mean, how in the world. I am sorry --your name-- But......SHIT!!!"

She will then promptly walk out, leaving you with the tomate sauce and oregano, and ofcourse, a big bill. Bad. No girl, no money.

So how do you prevent this kind of shit..........this is where the masquer comes in.

The Method
Take her for a walk. For God's sake dont go to an expensive restaurant (or some public place), because like in the previous scenario, if the girl feels like telling (reminding) you how much you suck, you might just prefer cows and stray dogs overhearing. A nice little park would be fine (not the ones infamous for the humping that goes around behind the bushes). One where the budhau uncles and aunties go for a walk would be great, provided you can find one. (budhau uncles maybe dangerous at times, though).

Get some popcorn. Try avoiding ice-cream, as a lot of girls tend to throw it around (mostly on people's faces) when they get angry/distraught. You wouldnt look too good with a lot of gooey, sticky icecream on your not so handsome face.

Start out with small talk. Exams, grades, professors and parents are best avoided. Also avoid talking about other girls, particulary the new neighbourhood hottie. A 15 minute warm-up is enough, time to take the plunge buddy. Ready ... steady...... GO!

(XYZ is the girl's name)

You : XYZ. I dont know why I am doing this...but I need to tell you something.
Her : What! (Caution: Her instincts tell her there is something up your sleeve. She is not showing it, but beware, her antennae are already out.)
You : I dont know.
Her : Go on, tell me. We are 'good friends', arent we. (Really!?!?!?!)
You : I have battling with this for ages now. (Exaggeration 'always' works)
Her : With what (She's scared. You could be battling with an STD for all she knows!!)
You : Well. I think I really really like you.
Her : huh!?
You : Hey take it easy. I just meant that I AM MAD about you. But I dont know anything about you think of me. You know what, it doesn't even matter. I love you, and , well, would want you to love me too. But its OK..if you dont. I told you, because I would have regretted it for the rest of my life, had I never spoken. I just want you to know that I 'll be always there for you. No matter what.

OK. I should take a break here. The last line has enuf sentiaapa, but go ahead and pepper it with better stuff. Most girls (except the geeky ones you might find at an IIT) just 'love' the sentiaapa. This line should make the girl think a 100 times about you, in maybe a span of a couple of hours (girls have extraordinary brains, when it comes to this kind of stuff). Make it amply clear that you have NO expectations from her.....just ***unconditional*** love is what you have put on offer. Wait a week now. The probalility of a good response is about 50% here (assuming your a complete idiot, i.e.). But if she doesnt give you a damn, give up dude, she is smarter, and wouldnt fall for a dolt. Try your luck elsewhere........Best of luck

Warning
TRY THE TECHNIQUE AT YOUR OWN RISK. NO SUING. ONLY WOOING.

the masquer

One day in my room!!!

2005-12-04T01:52:00.000-08:00

The first few days of a vacation are always fun. You play cricket, watch movies, and well yes, jerk off too (though some people dont wait for the vacations to do that!!)
The junta is in full masti....its like some people were waiting the whole damned sem for these fun-filled days....heheheh. And in the meanwhile, the more "creative" guys like me also read novels...like I read Chetan Bhagat's "One night @ the call center". Let me tell you right-away that the book is toto hugga. So please dont waste your time and energies (and not to mention your parents hard-earned money) on this badly-written, meaningless trash. There are better things in life to blow your money on (Girls...for instance...hahahahahahah!!!).
This 'girl' thing leaves me pretty confused a lot of times. I mean, how much does one really need to do to get that one kiss (READ peck on the cheek). Spend maybe half a dozen grand on the girl. Impress the girls parents. Play with her demented kid brother, and tell her the guy's so smart...he will go nowhere but IIT!!! (but damn, IITs not much different from 'nowhere' or is it?) Or maybe, grab her, and just kiss her (of course, you pay the price.....the gaand mein police ka dandaa for sure). Are there any answers, or is it like a Technical Arts question, that has hundreds of answer, but probably no RIGHT answer.

---------------------------------BIG SHIT COMING YOUR WAY-----------------------
Oops, while I was sooooo busy writing my all-important, insightful blog......some shitty wingmate of mine came running into my room, and screamed at the top of his voice....."TA ke marks aa gaye". The idiot, I thought, why in the world now......that when I was helping so many of the worlds destitute, demoralised lovers by giving them some very important steps to get that girl (*whatever 'get' means*) Anyways, I had no option but to open my mailbox, and check.
CHRIST!! He had mailed each of us the entire marks list......too bad. "So everyone now knows my marks!!!!" I thought...uhhhh but who in the world really cares. I was at peace again, knowing, that no shit-head in this paagal insti wud give a damn about what I scored in my TA exam. It just happened that I had miserable marks (it always happens...doesn't it?). And hell, even my Chaapu roomie was pareshan.
"Kahin isme to bikka nahin lag jayegaa?"
"hmmm.....lekin bakiyon mein to cool ikka hai" I say, blissfully unaware of the impending storm.
"WHAT , a B in a 5 credit course......are u mad or something" he screams at me. He screams so loud, I suffer temporary deafness for a moment.
It just hits me....TA's a fuckin 5 credit course...I think of an AERO senior, who once told me how he was 'raped' (quoting him...) in the TA course, b'coz he got a C.
Does the same fate await me?

Who the fuck knows. Screw it all......

Byeeeee,
Keep checking to know what happened to me.

The FIRST one

2005-12-02T06:57:00.000-08:00

One hard long week later......I am back. New blog, new thoughts.

Bad things happened here at IIT. A classmate jumped off the 6th floor of the Fac Building, and ended his life. Exam stress, bored of life, I dont know, and will never know. But it was bad, very bad.

But then, its back to normal once again.

For the masquer, its something to think about.

So why would someone do it, take the most extreme step. A popular notion is, that such people lack courage. That is highly debatable. The best line of thought, I think is, that when one faces problems that are far greater that what the person could cope with, he/she take this extreme step. Death, however aint a solution. How can u feel relieved, when u dont even exist. To feel good, one has to stay alive right?

It takes me back to some ol' days. I remember walking down a road with Su. And I was telling, how I had lost my virginity, how life had screwed me in every orifice my poor body had. Then he said that. "You got to face it, buddy. You asked it for it. This is something you always wanted, and you are doing the right thing." This was just a sample of the wodges of efficacious advice Su has given me.

Will write a lot more very soon......

Coming soon!!!!

2005-11-10T05:57:00.000-08:00

the posts are coming soon..........verrrrrrrry soon!!!!